Thank you...

Thank you for understanding. Thank you for being there for me last night. Thank you for caring. I love you. I really do. I care about you more than I care for any other being.
You keep telling me that I'm a "kickass chick" and I can only hope that you'll see that this is me. I am the person you are seeing. Nobody else has ever given me a chance to open up to you the way I'm able to. Nobody else has ever cared as much as you do.
You need to dump her. It will no doubtedly hurt her, but it's in YOUR best interest. It's YOUR heart I'm worried about. I don't know her, but what I know from your words is that she uses you. She uses you and you put up with it. Why? You assume things will get better. I assumed that as well. I only want to see you happy, and I think that you'd be happiest with me. We are SO MUCH alike. She's only going to end up hurting you in the end. You need to end it. You need to be with me. And I with you.

To John.
WHY?! Why did you feel the need to have passionate sex after three fucking years of nothing even near it? It made me cry afterwards. You didn't notice that. I hated you for hours afterwards. Just for making me feel like I could still love you. You have NEVER french kissed me. Why now? Did you cheat? Did you break my trust somehow? It's just not right. You've done something. You've done something bad, and I will not stop until I find it. I'll be leaving in this year. I'll be leaving where I can be happy.
THIS is why I need my license. I don't need a job. I need a license. That way, I can just take my car, pack it with my things, and leave. And never fucking come back. You can keep the animals. You can keep the mediocre things that I thought meant something. It will be hard to break up with you. Because you always blame me for everything. Because everything has always been my fault. Because according to you, I'm just an idiot who can do nothing right. I hate it. I have hated it. I just don't think I can take it much more. As soon as his house gets built, I'm moving in. And I'm leaving here. I'm leaving you. And I will finally be happy once I'm gone. And I will wait. I will wait until I can be Jason's girl. We will have a beautiful relationship. We will try to have a child together. We will be perfect, which is too much for you to even comprehend.

I do not need you. I do not need the sarcastic comments. I do not need the mental abuse every fucking day. I do not need you bitching about my friends just because I enjoy talking to them. I do not need YOU.

I'll be gone soon enough. At which point, there will be nothing you can do. I'll be gone, you'll be alone. Things will be wonderful in my life.
Yes, I will cry over what might have been. But then I will tell myself that it never could have been, because you were a jerk to me too many times. And I put up with it because I thought I loved you.